Sorry for taking Kevin Spacey in the Usual Suspects way out of context, but the blue funk, Dark Passenger, Kaiser Sosay has taken off, just like that and it's so freaking weird and annoying. I spent Tuesday night and much of yesterday crying, upset, praying for strength. Dearest pretty much dragged me out of the house to go with him to pick up the kids. They were getting their school pictures back, I stayed in the car while he sorted out the details. He ended up getting the most expensive package, but I can't say I blame him, our kids are pretty cute! The picture brought me a little happiness.
Dearest, stopped by our usual Starbucks, got the guys a cookie and us a pair of lattes and then we zipped over to the grocery store where I wandered in to get some eggs. I remember getting out of the car and feeling bad, then walking up to the store, then walking up the aisle and in the aisle, I noticed how heavy my legs felt and how sluggish I felt. I gave myself a little more gas and it dissapated. And then, like that I felt better. It was weird. I got into the car and said to Dearest "I feel better!" I was shocked and he was most visibly relieved. It's insane, an hour ago I was on the couch crying my eyes out and now I'm back to normal.
It came as a huge relief to me as well, it's just frustrating and annoying as hell to snap in and out of these moods. Hopefully I won't be snapping out of this mood for a good long while.
Right now I feel as groggy as hell and my body feels like it's been boxing with a grizzly, but at this point, it's an improvement. Normally I'd get started on all the things I have to catch up on, but I'm going to try a different strategy of taking it easy. I still have things to do, but instead of running around, I think I'll hole up in here today and putter around. Hopefully that will prolong the good, or tired mood that I'm in.